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Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps could you make the BEAR a Christian?" Very well," said the voice. The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And then the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together and bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."This One Is Compliments of Rrrosco From the Land Down Under!!!Murphy drops some buttered toast on the kitchen floor, and lo behold ... and it lands butter-side-up.He looks down in astonishment, for he knows it's a law of the universe that buttered toast always falls butter-down. So he rushes round to theParish to fetch Father Flanagan.He tells the Priest that a miracle has occurred in his kitchen. He won't say what it is, but asks Fr.Flanagan to come. I’ll get you some clothes tomorrow ok?’ I replied smiling.‘Can I come with you?’ She replied.‘Might be a bit awkward walking round a store in just that t-shirt.’ I replied.‘Oh yeah, I guess.’ She replied.‘What sizes do you need?’ I asked, trying to sound innocent.‘Oh, er, size 4 tops and pants, 30b bras please.’ She replied, then went back to watching the TV while I cleaned up dinner. Once finished I gave her another sleeping tablet which she eyed suspiciously but took anyway and soon fell asleep. I carried her to the spare bedroom and laid her in bed, then went back to my own bed to get some sleep.It was dark when I was woken by a sound in the hallway. I got up and made my way downstairs where I found Charlie trying to open the front door.‘What are you doing?’ I shouted as I grabbed her.‘Get off me, I’m going, you can’t keep me, I’m not your prisoner.’ She screamed.‘Charlie, stop.’ I shouted as I continued fighting with her.‘Fuck off. I need to leave.’ She screamed back with a rage.
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