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You think I’d just pick up something and swing like I’m trying to hit a home run? I thought you knew me better than that. Everything I used last night was used on myself first to make sure I wouldn’t be hurting her.”That seemed to mollify them some, but they still seemed troubled. I turned to Beck and took her face in my hands. I kissed her lightly. “I think you need to tell them what you told Manda. They don’t get it.”We sat at the table and for the next hour we explained Bad Matt and how Beck felt like she had all of me when she was able to coax him out of hiding. She talked about how she felt about pain and how she felt about the degrading things we did. Over time, they both came to understand what she meant, but I don’t think Mom liked it in particular.The rest of the week passed in something of a blur, with all of us chasing down the last details before school started. I made a point of spending time with all of my girls through the week, making a night available for each of. I'm not gay and don't want to be but I hatethe persecutions that some guys actively pursue against gays. It makesme nervous seeing two men kiss but I don't want to take a hammer tothem either.Another concern was the simple mechanics of the whole thing. I thoughtit was possible to do anal sex from the front, probably with the helpof a pillow under her or with her on top and able to change the angleof entry. Even by standing at the side of the bed rather than being ontop of her. A small problem with that there would be no way possibleto ignore her more masculine body features. So the best position, atleast to start, would be from behind.In addition, I personally couldn't even guess how much it would hurtto have something put up my own ass. But I knew any muscle could berelaxed with a little effort and thought. If she was upset, she wasgoing to clench her muscles and it could even be impossible. Butworked on a little, she would relax and at least make it possible. Andthe value of.
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