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A half-hour later, Ruth arrived to spend the night with me Ruth silently held me as I wept. There is no way I can go anywhere this morning. I do not know how I am going to deal with this. I do not know what I am going to say to Ken. I feel so ashamed and dirty. I played the roll of a slut and I became one? How could he forgive me? How can I forgive myself? Thursday October 30, 1980 Dear Diary: I could not bring myself to write these last three days. My mind has been awash with feelings of dread and anger. I taught my lessons without energy or joy. My steps were so heavy Monday and Tuesday that several students asked why I looked so sad. I really should have taken the days off but I needed to do something to distract me from wallowing in my misery. Ruth is a godsend. She has quietly comforted me. She cooked the meals and repeatedly listened to my self incrimination. She has not judged me, including when I confessed what I happened with Maria and Ken in September. She listened quietly. ”“Huh, what do you mean?”“Show me how you rubbed yourself.”“You want me to go up on the ladder?”“No Jason, right here in front of me. Show me how you rubbed yourself.”Jason reached to the front of his shorts rubbing the front. I could see the outline of his cock getting hard in his shorts. Jason shocked me when he spoke up, “It would help if you opened up that robe a little.”To my own surprise I opened my robe enough to give him a good view of my cleavage. Jason moaned and rubbed harder. “If you’re going to do it, take it out,” I said to him staring at his crotch.Without hesitation, Jason stood up dropping his shorts. He sat back down holding his hard cock in his hand. Slowly stroking his cock he started at my tits. “You can see mine, I would sure love to see more of yours.”I debated with myself for a moment, then stood up. I open my robe to expose my tits.“Oh my God Mrs. Samuels, those of the first tits I’ve seen that weren’t on a computer. They are incredible,” Jason continued to.
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