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Wanting you to be here after our "big date". Wanting to have you read me that Valentine's card full of clich?that you had gotten for me. Wanting to read you the Valentine's poem that I'd written just for you. Roses are red...Wanting you to be here with me. Wanting to feel your arms around me as I suck your bottom lip and nuzzle against your neck. Wanting you to make love to me over and over and over again.I finally stop my fantasizing long enough to get ready for bed. Even though it was cold and damp out, I put on a sheer negligee and even add a quick spritz of perfume. I laugh at myself, without humor, for doing this. Whom am I trying to fool? I crawl under my blankets and think of you again. I think what it would be like to have you here beside me. How it would be to feel the warmth of your body next to me and how it would be to have you reach for me and pull me into your arms. I turn to my side, almost prepared to see you lying there... but all that is there is an empty space; as. I woke up on the first morning of the lockdown and I sat up in bed. There was the mirror, opposite me. My reflection had that sort of blurry still-half-asleep look, with big-bad-bed-hair and puffy eyes. But hey, she was sorta pretty, I thought. You know, I’d do her. And, knowing that I had nothing else to do, I thought I’d start the day on a high note. I wiggled down the length of the bed so I was sat on the edge, directly opposite the mirror. “Hello, pretty,” I said to myself.You have to love yourself. I learned that early on. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t expect anyone else to love you. That’s not to say I think I’m perfect. Far from it. I’m really critical of my appearance; but working in theatre requires confidence, and you have to work with what you have. So I stared at my reflection in the mirror, checking out everything I had.Wide brown eyes: check. Long (messy, tangled) dark brown hair: check. Nose that is slightly too big for my face (I scrunch my nose up and frown.
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