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Never to meet, never to look into each others eyes. It need not be. We have already looked into each others souls, and found kindred spirits… understanding… intimacy. Lovers in words. To meet would shatter the connection, destroy the safe, free, secret, intimate place. Total freedom! No inhibitions. Not just passion and sex. Oh, I have been there. I have known great passions, and great sex. But sensual exploration of sexuality, loss of all thought and inhibition, losing CONTROL. Total surrender. How can one just surrender their thoughts, their senses? I go through the days of my regular life having to be serious, stay serious… stay in control of myself. Coolly dealing with the realities of life. How then do I surrender myself? The very thought of doing this awakens something in me that has lain dormant. I WANT IT! To not be bound by anything, to explore and be explored. To discover and be discovered, mind… body… soul… all senses. Oh, the allure! The attraction of just letting go…. The front door at home was locked which was a little unusual and I rang the bell."Sorry sweetheart" said my mother as she opened the door, "I felt a little tired and your sister is with your aunt Margaret for the day and I have been having a nap, goodness, you're lathered, tough day ?" Yes" I replied, "I badly need a shower" I secured my bike and entered, my mother was standing in front of the kitchen window wearing a dress which I had always liked and was inevitably, the dress of my fantasies. It was a simple black sleeveless cotton dress which showed off her figure even though she didn't like it saying it emphasised all her lumps and bumps. I could see little tears of perspiration running down her armpits and the edge of her bra discoloured by the same sweat. Her breasts always looked full and heavy in that dress whilst it stretched across her backside and at the front strained over her little pot belly. I stood behind her smelling the sweat and the musky odour which was her own and.
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