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I leapt to my feet and drew my sidearm before rushing to the bathroom. I tried the door - it was locked. Of course it'd be locked, you fucking dickhead, I thought. One of the sexiest women on the planet was in there! And the last thing she'd want was me walking in on her whilst she was taking a shit! Suddenly there was another piercing scream, followed by the cry for help, only this time it sounded even more pitiful than the first occasion. I couldn't waste any more time. I took a step back and lunged forcefully at the door. It gave way easily and I came crashing down on top of it as it hit the floor. I quickly got to my feet, raised my weapon (not that, you dirty minded bastard! My sidearm!) and scanned the room…nothing! Just Britney stood against the far wall staring in horror at the bathtub. I walked over to the bath and looked in…would you believe it - a spider! Britney Spears had just taken ten years off my life because of a little spider…well, actually to be fair, it was quite. .. like me for instance, or much, much younger ... they, well, they often find a large penis very, very exciting and pleasurable."Tristan looked up."Really?" Oh yes, darling -- you mustn't worry," replied Doris softly."Even when it doesn't fit?" added Tristan."What do you mean??" asked Doris."It never fits ... inside ... inside the girl, I mean" he answered earnestly, albeit with some exasperation for having to stumble a bit for the right words. "The woman I loved -- she was the first woman I could ... she was the first one I could fit quite a bit of it inside; and even then not at first, and only after I had to ... force it. I really didn't like hurting her."Doris was truly taken aback. This latest information genuinely shocked her; what was worse, it excited her. She felt flush all over. "Tristan, darling, please don't be embarrassed," she said sweetly. "But ... exactly how big ... is it ... I mean, when it's fully aroused?" Doris knew she was wrong to put the question to the boy,.
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