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A body of water sloshed over my face and as I jerked up for air something hit me. BAM right in the crotch.“Jesus! Fuck! What the hell?!!” I looked around squinting and a blonde girl had swum past me from behind. Clutching my nuts I said “Was that you? Did you just kick me in the nuts?”“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean it, my idiot friend Paolo tried to dunk me.” She was hot, smoking hot, and American by her accent.“Ooowww. You have no idea how much this aches.” I said, emphasizing the foetal ‘in pain’ grimace. “Seriously I could be impotent…”“Awww I’m sorry… well have to see about that though…” she glanced at her friends who had carried on frolicking, eyed me up and came closer, the goosebumps on her thighs touching my hairy legs. “Here, let me make it better.” Score! A feminine hand pulled at the band of my trunks, exposing my particulars to the cool ocean water, and ran down the shaft of my cock to gently stroke my balls. I flinched slightly, having been on the receiving end. )1. The patient refused autopsy. (Wouldn't you?)2. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital. (Could be a problem.)3. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year. (Really! Someone roll her over.)4. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared. (Check under her legging.)5. The patient is tearful and crying constantly.She also appears to be depressed. (Ya think?)6. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful. (How's that again?)7. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.(Well, I'm glad we've got that timeline straight.)8. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid. (Rectal? Thyroid? OMG!)9. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation. (Huh?)10. Skin: somewhat pale but present. (Could be very messy otherwise.)11. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor. (Couldn't we use a more comfortable surface? A table? A bed? Something?)And a few more...A quiz...Q1. If.
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