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After I finished, the Captain started immediately, 'You have committed a number of offences both on land and at sea. One, you entered a secret military area. Two, you boarded a military vessel, twice. And three, you resisted arrest. The seriousness of these crimes would lead me to suspect that a Caledonian military court may seek the death penalty and at sea, I am entitled to enact the same justice you would receive on the mainland... ''Please!', I interrupted. 'I didn't mean to. I'm not from Hamilton and I didn't know... '. Without warning, her partner stepped forwards and kicked backs of my legs toppling me onto the floor.'DO NOT INTERRUPT THE CAPTAIN', she barked at me.' ... the same justice you would receive on the mainland, and am therefore considering what to do with you.''Shall I prepare the plank, Captain?'The captain looked at me in thought. 'No. Not yet.', she finally said.'But Captain with the greatest respect, we can't ever let him go. All of this has been top secret for. This was the part I had been dreading most. Where to begin? Should I start with the sad news that I was out of work, warn him that I had four credit card companies on my tail or should I appeal to his sympathy and tell him I had broken up with my girlfriend?I took a long swig of beer, stalling.Seeing that I was still pondering his questions, Ed struck again. "Any marriage plans on the horizon? What's your girl's name?" Veronica," I said."Oh yes, Veronica, sexy name. Sexy woman, too, from the looks of her in the picture you sent." Veronica left me. I'm out of work, too." Oh," he said, contemplatively. "Did losing your job have anything to do with her taking off or was her leaving inevitable?" Both, losing my job and it was inevitable," I said, looking at my brother, admiringly. He had a knack for getting right to the heart of the issue. Next, I predicted, he'd ask how bad it really was."How bad is it?"Saved by the bell, a car horn interrupted his cross examination. "Aw, there's my.
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