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I was still feeling emotional bouts of the other phases off and on, but I was in college, doing something with my life, living my life. And for me, sex was a big part of living, and still is ;). I kept my condition private, if anyone noticed and asked about my weak hand, I’d say it was nerve damage from a martial arts training injury. I knew what my end was going to be, if I allowed it to get that far. The doctors were very clear about how things were going to progress. “You will, over the next ten years or so, loose strength and muscular function. You will need to have splints made to keep your joints from contracting; eventually you will drown in your own secretions as the muscles in your throat loose function. Mentally you will have no impairments.” Meaning I will be cognoscente and aware throughout the whole process, trapped inside my own body while I slowly drowned in my own spit. I wasn’t interested in being pathetic before I actually was. I was going to be the best “Me” I. "I want a bouquet of orchids." He told the clerk behind the counter."You want a bouquet of orchids?" she asked. She cocked one eyebrow."Yeah, I'm in a romantic mood and I want to tell her. Women like that stuff, you know," he told her confidentially."Sir, are you joking? Don't you mean roses? Red roses are used to say 'I love you.' Orchids are for more formal occasions." She looked at him as if she wasn't certain who or what she was talking to."Well, I want to say, 'I formally love you.' So make me up a big armload and deliver them to my house." I don't have any more time to waste on this nonsense." She looked down at the man sitting in his wheelchair, "You take your stupid games and leave here right now."Jack reached in his shirt pocket and brought out a thin roll of hundreds. He peeled off three of them. "Is this enough to get your ass moving?" Oh," she answered in a small voice. "I apologize. But nobody has ever ordered anything like this before."Jack gave her his address. "Send.
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