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Yes, that sounds incredibly stupid, but when you're in love, you do what you do.We swabbed each other, which was kind of fun and sealed those up tight. Stacy's idea for Michael was to get him over to our place, and get him drunk enough to consent. Yeah, nothing can go wrong with that plan?We started getting RSVPs and suddenly the wedding seemed real to me. Juan, Michael and I scheduled us for a fitting for tuxes. Stacy's best friends Gloria and Tiffany went to the same place for their bridesmaid's dresses. I didn't know either or them ... Juan did. He was clearly 'on the make' for Gloria, who was the bustier of the two young ladies. After two hours, the three guys left, not before Juan had Gloria's number in his phone. I used to be that guy, but falling in love changes you.You become responsible, which pissed me off to no end. Especially the way June would say things. I open the door, she says, 'It's so nice to see the good manners return.' I pull out a chair, 'It's been ages since. A slim paperbackbook called 101 DEAD U.S. SOLDIER JOKES and another entitled DROWNINGPUPPIES FOR FUN & PROFIT...He jumps up, agitated, and starts rushing around the room. "The pervert'sfuneral is tomorrow! That's not much time to get ready. Okay now, let'ssee.... What do we need? What do we need?"He reaches up and grabs his hat to make sure it's still on his head,"Stetson hat- CHECK!"He hurries over to a bunch of rainbow-colored picket signs leaning upagainst the wall, and flips through them, quickly surveying theirvenomous messages, "Hate signs- CHECK!"He pulls a scroll of paper out of his pocket, unfurls it and glances atit. "List of the true faithful who will join me on my holy crusadetomorrow, all seven of 'em! CHECK! No wait, make that six," he correctshimsef as he crosses off one of the names with a pencil, "Cousin Jasperis in jail."He zips to another table where a loud hailer is lying, picks it up andsays through it in a harsh booming voice, "Bullhorn, with batteriescharged-.
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