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" Want to know what I think?"Over the short period of time they worked together, they worked asequals, not competitors - each one trying to get the best from the other.Her input on "what he was" would be from a different perspective, so:"Okay, I'll bite, why?" Because it brings out the best in you!" HUNH! Give me that again." In this industry, you need to be creative to survive. Your femme side isthe creative side of you. You want to be a man, so you want to ridyourself of what you see as a weakness. The femme goes, your creativedrive goes - and you suffer in silence at that loss." You don't think of me as a pervert, sissy, or, well, some other sickbeing." Christ no! Look - you use your male side for some things, and the femalefor others. When you integrate one side with the other, you can switchbetween them and use whichever side you need at that particular moment.There's a balance in your life. When you try to kick out the feminine,you upset the balance, and everything goes out of. I thought about it, but didn’t want to cheat on her”.Tracy swirled her drink. “Lynn told me she never though you cheated. And she loved you for it”I smiled. “I couldn’t do that to her”.Tracy smiled, and gave me a hug. “I love you for that. For protecting Lynn. For not hurting her. That wasn’t easy. Have you been with anyone since she passed?”“No, I haven’t. Her passing seemed to take my mind off it, and it just didn’t seem to be right, that soon after she passed”.Tracy turned to face me, and put her hand on my knee. “A few years ago, Lynn asked me for advice on how to help you. She wanted me to tell you it was OK with her if you strayed. I told her no – that wouldn’t be fair to you. You wouldn’t do it, and it would confuse and frustrate you”.I paused, looked down. “Wow, I wasn’t aware she cared that much”.“She loved you very much. About a month before she died, she asked me to reach out to you, to make sure you found someone else, you continued to live”.I smiled. Tracy.
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