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”“I know, John,” She reassured me. “And please, call me Becky. Before long, you’re going to know me well enough that calling me Mrs. Schuman will seem way too formal.”“OK, uh, Becky,” I said, trying out the name. “I’m still amazed that you know what’s going on and aren’t about to kill me.”She laughed at that and kept going. “Katie does more than tell me what you two have been up to, John, she tells me how she feels about it.”“Oh?”“Yes, and let me say, she thinks you’re doing a fantastic job of being a boyfriend.”“That’s good. I don’t have any experience at it.”“Keep up the good work,” Mrs. Schuman said. “She’s fallen in love with you.”“I’m falling in love with her, too.”“Are you a virgin, John?” she asked. Blunt, but effective.“Yes, I am,” I admitted, “in every way. Katie’s the only girl I’ve even kissed.”“That’s actually a good thing,” Becky told me. “That way I don’t have to break any bad habits. Now, in my experience, boys and girls think differently about their virginity. For you,. Total K.O. I fell unconscious for half a minute and collapsed on the floor. When I returned to consciousness I saw Jack weltered in pain on the floor beside me and wailed loudly, gripping his balls.My wife Beth was standing with her arms on her waist and was just telling everybody in the restaurant, "If somebody tries to injure my husband they'll get the same balls kick from me! I was a good soccer player!"While Jack's wife was trying to help him, I could stand up with the help of my wife. The staff of the restaurant ran to us to separate the two families, but Jack could not stand up from the floor. He was moaning from the constant pain, so the ambulance was called and Jack was taken to the hospital.Next day the police came to us to interview my wife and me. The doctors had operated on Jack. He lost one of his testicles as a result of my wife's successful soccer free kick. It was destroyed totally and the other testicle had to heal up for weeks. He became sterile. Jack's wife had.
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