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‘You’re right, Lena does need that stability, she had such an emotionally deprived childhood with no father figure. You give her that and your love as a man. It’s not quite the same for me. Oh Mike, I was so mixed up after Steve and you being shared gave me emotional stability after that experience. I was lucky, I have a great mum and dad so I didn’t really need that sort of support but I did need a rock to cling to after Steve and you were it. I don’t want to lose that feeling for you, it was and is, so important to me. Without you none of this would have happened. I wouldn’t have found myself again, not met Guy, not be here now to be married in a month.’ I held him tight. ‘I love you and I think I always will. Oh not in the way I love Guy, you know that, but I still do. That’s why I wanted you tonight and I’ll still want you in the future.’ I felt happier now I’d explained myself to him and he seemed to understand as we sat together holding each other. After a little while he moved. That night we all decided to stay in,my friend had asked me if it would be ok if they came over. I didn't want to be "that girl" so i said "sure no problem". When the guys got there they walked in with enough beer for a week. They were leaving the next day as well and i guess they didn't drink as much beer as they thought they were going to and didn't want to leave it behind and waste it cause they were renting there condo, so they brought it over and suggested beer pong. we were playing tournaments and the competitive juices were flowing,one game led to another and another and before we knew it we were all beyond drunk. We decide to stop and my friend decides she wants to smoke so we all took a few hits,after that one by one all my girlfriends starting passing out on the couches. i could barely stand but i had to make it to my parents California King,it was calling my name. I don't remember how long i was in there for before i realized that one of the guys had walked into the room.
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