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” He gets a scooter.Next day the guy that got the scooter was riding along and he saw the guy who owned the Rolls Royce crying.He asked, “Why are you crying you have such a nice car?” and the man sobbed, “My wife just went by on roller skates.”Phone Operator: “G’day mate ... Helpline here ... What’s the problem?”Customer: “I’m in the Outback with the girlfriend and she’s been stung on her thigh by a hornet and now her vagina has completely closed up!”Australian Telephone Operator: “Bummer!”Customer: “Great advice! Thanks mate, bye.”These are compliments of Gary H.Disturbing Beer News.Yesterday, University scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women. To test the theory, 100 men were fed 8 pints of beer each within a 1 hour period. It. " Today you mean." Valerie corrected as she looked at the large clock on the fireplace mantle and noted that it was one in the morning."Whatever..." Robyn said, grabbing another handful of popcorn."Does this new asshole category include Brian?" Valerie asked, drawing up a mental image of Robyn's on again off again quarterback boyfriend."Brian's both a prick and an asshole!" The long haired girl replied. "Turns out he was screwing both Jenny Davis and Helen Williams." That would be on the nights you were seeing someone else?" Valerie asked."Yes, I mean, that was different..." Robyn replied."Of course." Val smiled."What about you?" Robyn quickly asked, changing the subject. "You haven't said one word about the guys at State. You can't tell me you've been celibate all this time."While Valerie hadn't Robyn's experience with boys, she was far from a virgin. There had always been guys who realized that she was cute in her own way and would rather date a girl who's idea of an intelligent.
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