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." Like a parasite," said the Scarecrow with distaste."It seems symbiotic enough to me," grinned Joan Jones, looking down ather chest, then she sighed, "But unfortunately it seems that nowhere inthis four-color realm is there anything that can help someone likeme..... down below. Below the waist I'm stuck with what nature inflictedon me. I suppose the gods and goddesses of Oz have their reasons, andperhaps the agony of this false existence---and the scorn I face from myfamily and nearly everyone I meet---is meant to to teach me something.But I wish..... I just wish..."And as the orchestra swelled behind her she began to sing:"I oft lay awake nights thinkin',How my life wouldn't be so stinkin,if I only had a womb...My depression and my sorrow,might all be gone tomorrow,If I only had a womb!"Though I'm quite female in spirit,there are those who just won't hear itSince I haven't got a womb...They're far meaner than they'd have to beAnd won't let me use the proper lava'tryCause I haven't. Sye is the local barber and I hadn’t been aware that he did home visits. But then again, if Phyllis and Sis told Sye he did home visits, then I doubt the guy dared argue; I know I wouldn’t!Sye was stropping his cutthroat razor when I finally arrived in the kitchen where apparently it had been decided that he was going to perform the surgery. I queried the cutthroat, but Sye insisted that a safety razor would make a real pigs ear of removing my several years growth of beard. Actually I became somewhat concerned at first until I realised that Sye -- not someone I visited in his professional capacity very often -- was taking the rise out of me by pretending he had Parkinson’s or something, as he approached me wielding that bloody great sword. But I have to admit that I hardly felt the old bugger shave the thing from my face.I did however feel his ministrations when he attacked my hair. Shit, when Sye gave you a haircut, it was a little like those one’s I remember from when I was a kid..
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