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Penises of all shapes and sizeslittering the street. John thought this highly amiss, but assumed that whatever he'd takenlast night must still be affecting him. What had he taken last night?Where was he last night? What did he do? All these questions and morefurrowed his brow. He couldn't even remember what he was doing 12minutes ago, let alone 12 hours.So off he went to work. He worked in a large office block in the middleof London, and everywhere he went he kept finding more willies. He evencame upon the occasional testicle or two, but tried to ignore them andact like nothing was happening. Otherwise they'd surely know he wastaking drugs. He paid little attention to anyone around him and justwent about his data inputting work as normal. A zombified twenty-something going nowhere. In his lunch break, a couple of girls came over to his table. They woreclothes pegs on their noses to stop themselves having to smell John'sgruesomely tangible, unwashed-odour. They were giggling. Lisa was absolutely right, Colleen was special. She always had his back and he had to do something really unexpected. He called one of the ritziest restaurants in town and made reservations for 1 PM on Valentine’s Day. He made sure to send his best suit to the cleaners and called a florist and made other arrangements. He knew Colleen would be bowled over. Colleen came in early on Valentine’s morning and saw her desk and the card. She looked at everything and came in to Elliot’s office. Her reaction was NOT anything at all like he had expected it would be. ‘What’s this?’ She asked as she held up the card. ‘What’s with the roses and this sentimental card? `Love, Elliot’? We don’t have that kind of relationship,’ she chewed him out before angrily returning to her desk. Elliot felt like he was in some surreal movie. He had no idea why she was acting like this, it was entirely unlike Colleen. She had been really upset. ‘COLLEEN!’ he shouted to get her back in the office. ‘What was that.
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