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Better watch out when you venture near that house!” Soon stories went around about the ghost of the doctor chasing people through the forest, or actually catching people and experimenting on them in his cellar. People made sure to avoid the house, especially at night. And on Halloween none of the local children dared to ring the doorbell of Forest Lane no.1 when on their trick-or-treat round through town. Elizabeth, however, remained in the house. Relatives had tried to convince her to sell the house and move somewhere else, to move on with her life, but she didn’t listen. On Fridays she would appear in the market to buy her weekly fruits and vegetables, but no one dared to approach her to ask her their burning questions, to satisfy their own curiosity. The market salesmen sometimes inquired about her well being, but as their questions were only met with a weary smile they soon gave up questioning her altogether. Although living in seclusion, Elizabeth wasn’t living entirely in. There in the spotlight is a table with three walnuts on it. In comes a little old Jewish man 5 foot tall and barely able to walk up to the table. He unzips his pants and whips out the longest shlong and proceeds to smash all three walnuts with three swings!The crowd erupts in thunderous applause and the Amazing Goldstein is carried off by the clowns.Twenty years later the salesman visits a nearby town and lo and behold — he sees a faded banner for the same circus and the same “DON’T MISS THE AMAZING GOLDSTEIN!” message. The salesman can’t believe the old guy is still alive much less still doing his incredible act! Of course, he buys a ticket and sits impatiently through all the acts until again the center ring is illuminated. This time there are three COCONUTS on the table.Out comes Goldstein. The little old man takes forever to creep to the table but this time he smashes the coconuts with three swings of his amazing God-given weapon.The stunned salesman requests a meeting with.
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