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Near the front, just below the stage, a pair of seven or eight-year-old twins were doing a twist that would have made both Elvis and Chubby Checker proud.Robbie and I did our If You See Him/If You See Her, and then Traci came back with Climb Every Mountain.I was glad that Tami had actually given us a program tonight so that we knew what we were singing before the music actually started. It made things easier. For my second song, we'd set up a stool in the center of the stage, and I sat on it. A single spot came up, with a dark red gel. "A few months ago, we lost a very special friend. This is for her."I watched Tami in the wings and waited for her cue like we'd practiced."Sarabeth is scared to death..." I started.At the sound board, Tami slowly brought up the music behind me.I started the chorus,"She dreams she's dancing..."A boy in a suit and baseball cap and a girl in a party dress suddenly started waltzing from the wings in front of me. I almost lost it when I realized that the. .The truth smashes into me with the force of a runaway train.Ruth has bequeathed to me her entire identity. She isn't coming back atall. She's provided me with everything I need to take up a new life asher.What the fuck makes her think I can get away with that? Even if I wantedto, I couldn't pretend to be a real girl for more than five minuteswithout being caught out.Why is she doing this? What's the point?It's too much to take in. I sit on the bed and put my head in my hands asit gradually sinks in that unless I find Ruth and persuade her to changeher mind I'll be stuck like this for good.And I haven't the foggiest idea where she might have gone.After a few minutes I get up and walk over to the window. Outside, rain isstill slanting across the glass, blurring the patterns of yellow-orangelights stretching towards Fratton and Portsmouth's northern suburbs.Two hundred thousand people in this city. Many of them will be headinghome from work, thinking only of a hot meal, a favourite.
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