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" I've never heard of consummating the engagement." It's a very old tradition." How old?" I asked.He looked at his watch. "I'd say it started in about three hours."He estimated it correctly.We were trying not to be too obvious, so we each slept at home.Sandy let me in around ten, as always with the big hug."Jeff's in the kitchen." She sang it.The beans were boiling and he was skimming off some foamy white stuff with a big spoon."What is that?" I asked."The farts." Jeff! That's not you. Where did that come from?" That's what Sam calls it. It's actually the oligosaccharides, which are -" Okay, it's the farts."Does the rest of his family find these long explanations interesting and endearing? Or do they sometimes want to scream, like I do?After two or three minutes there were no more farts collecting at the top.Jeff laid out the plan for cutting up the peppers and onions and sautéing them. He had his own version of The Joy of Cooking, which he demonstrated.I started to cut a pepper and. " Mikey laughs."Oh, piss off!" Jonathan retorts. "Like Krystie wouldn't rip your ballsoff if you didn't tell her beforehand!" Same goes for you and Jamie," Dan snorts at me. "And you've only justgot your balls!" They've got a point," Mikey sighs, shooting a sad smile in mydirection."Guys," I sigh. "I think we're going to need to make a united stand onthis one." My friends all nod at my words, the sombre looks on theirfaces telling me that they're not looking forward to what's coming next..."Oh look," Krystie teases as myself, Keith, Dan, Mikey and Jonathanstand by the side of the swimming pool where the girls are all laid outin their bikinis and swimsuits. "I do believe the BOYS are trying tomake a stand..." Ladies," Dan says, his nervous gulp ruining his confident exterior."BOYS," the six women- our partners plus Hannah, the only single Angel-respond in unison."We're going on a road trip for the next few days," Jonathan says,before withering under s stare from his (much shorter).
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