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.. shit! Ted Nugent!”The crowd went nuts again.“We are going to take a break and then Ted and the band will return for our last set and to welcome in the new year. Stay safe, eat food, party hard and remember rule number one...”Again the crowd joined in and recited our top rule.“ ... Don’t Be A Dick! We’ll be right back.”As I spoke Ted and the rest of the band had left the stage and gone back to the green room to change into our New Year costumes.After the break, the sound guy killed the dance music and played the opening fanfare from Emerson, Lake and Palmer’s “Fanfare For The Common Man” and we walked onto the stage wearing only diapers with sashes that had the new year printed on them. Carla and Wendy put up a bit of a fuss when we told them that they could not play topless. They both put on white tops that were see-through by the end of the night thanks to their sweating. They were glorious to behold!During the break, the servers had passed out the champagne to everyone. I looked. I grabbed up my shotgun and ran to see what was going on.I carefully stuck my head through the connecting door just far enough to see what was going on. A middle-aged woman was standing next to the bar with a shotgun in one hand and a small ax in the other. She was ranting about "demon rum" and the sin of drinking alcohol. All of the patrons were cowering behind upset tables, not daring to poke much more than their eyes past that dubious protection. The mirror behind the bar was shattered and the bartender was hunkered down behind the bar. A man was lying on the floor near the woman with blood flowing from a gash on the top of his head.While I watched, a man walked in the front door an up close to the woman. He said, "Please, Mrs. Simmons, put the ax an' gun down so we kin get he'p fer the marshal afore he bleeds ta death. Ya wouldn't want that on yer conscience, would ya?"She said, "Oh my goodness! I never meant to hit him that hard, but he scared me when he sneaked up behind me.".
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