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And hot. Shit!“Hi.”She stood, and we embraced. The hug lasted way too long, again. Didn’t faze me. As long as this night ends with her leaving me alone I don’t really care about a hug.“Nice place.”“Yes, it sure is. Would you like something to drink? Dinner is on me, order whatever you’d like.”“I’ll start with water.”That wasn’t what Miranda wanted to hear. She probably wants to get me drunk but there was no way that was happening. I’m not as dumb as I used to be. That might not be true, since I’m here in the first place.Dinner was very awkward. I had nothing to say, and Miranda was uncharacteristically shy. We barely spoke to each other at first. I felt bad, but I didn’t want to be here. She did, and she needs to say something before I leave.“Anthony?”“Yeah?”“Do you remember…when we first met?”Here we go.“Unfortunately.”“It wasn’t that bad, was it? If I remember correctly you came up to me and initiated the flirting. I wasn’t sure if you knew I was married, but after a few minutes I. I took a bird back to mine for sex last night. After some complaints for the first five minutes like,”Stop, you’re too big!” And,”Please No, you’re really hurting me now!” The fat cow eventually rolled off me and let me go on top.As I staggered into the living room and sat down on the sofa, my wife looked at me and said, “Can you not just go out and have a couple of fucking drinks?”“Of course I can,” I replied, standing back up. “Just let me get my coat.When my precious little dog fell in the river Mersey, a German tourist jumped in the freezing water and saved him.Upon getting back on the pier, he checked my puppy out and said, “Ze dog is ok, he vill be fine.”Out of curiosity I asked, “Are you a vet?”He replied, “Vet? I’m fuken soaked!I have realised I still have so many unanswered questions! I never found out who let the dogs out ... the way to get to Sesame Street ... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps ... why we don’t ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery” ... why women.
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