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." Okay," mum says, before smiling genuinely at me for the first time inmany, many years.None of us stay up for much longer after the 'discussion', opting forearly nights instead, though despite this, and how exhausting the day'sbeen, I still struggle to sleep in the house that was once a home, butis now totally alien to me. I'm just thankful I'm not sleeping in 'my'room- it would've been impossible for me to sleep in there.My mother is wrong in what she says, about me only pretending to bemale to spite her. It's who I am, and who I've always been on theinside. The last 24 hours have proved that, as have the 24 monthsbefore that. She never saw how I interacted with Ollie, or with myfriends in Cardiff, or even with Stuart and his friends. And shecertainly never saw me with my razor blade in my bedroom. My need to bemale would be the same regardless of who my parents are. The differenceis that it wouldn't be as 'urgent' if I didn't have a mother asdomineering as her.The fact that she. She scrambled out of the pool, her torn suit in hand, and ran into the house, shortly followed by my sister. I hoisted myself up and sat on the edge of the pool, unaware of what to do next. Eventually I went into the house, and I found my sister and Sarah talking on the couch. They looked up at me, but then down to my feet. I looked down and saw that I had dog poop all on my feet and in between my toes. "Gross!" my sister said, "Sarah, can my stupid brother use your shower so he doesn't have to walk home with dog crap on his feet?" Sure", she said, her face still slightly pink, "bathroom's right there". She pointed at a small room across the room, and I began to hobble my way over to it. Before I made it, my sister cursed under her breath."Shit! I have to go, mom will be home any minute to take me to cheer leading tryouts, and she'll kill me if she figures out we came over without asking. Later, Sarah!" Wait what about me?" I said frantically, pointing to my crap covered foot."Just.
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