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"I don't want Jackto be comfortable on his dates with Tammy! I want him to date me!" Oh, dear!" she started. "And Tammy likes him so." And you don't think I'm sitting by my phone waiting for him to call andask me out?" But you're a boy!" she replied. Well, thank you for updating me on thatfact! "Miss Johnson, you and Mother are the ones that wanted me to go outwith Jack in the first place, because you thought he might be gay and youwanted him to experience dating a girl, at least, as close to one as youcould get to. Look at me, Miss Johnson. I'm wearing some of the cutestundies a girl would ever dream of wearing. I'm wearing pantyhose and adress. Do these shoes look like anything a boy would wear? Yes, there is alittle, and I mean very little problem, between my legs, but I can assureyou, Miss Johnson, Carol, that I am as much, if not more of a girl thanmost of the girls at my school. I love the things Mother and I have beendoing together as a mother and daughter should. I enjoy the. Now before we get to this weeks' letters, Santa wants all of you to know that this past year has been one for the ages, and not in a good way. As I'm certain many of you already know, Santa has had a few legal problems I had to deal with. You may recall on last years' Christmas show, I threatened to burn down the house of a man named Jay, from New York. Well wouldn't you know it, his house actually did burn down on New Year's Eve. Of course, the police paid Santa a visit. I tell you, it's political correctness gone amok. I mean what kind of world are we living in where you can't even threaten to burn someones' house down without becoming a suspect the second it happens?" Well anyway, that matter was cleared up. Santa was way too ill to be anywhere except home in bed on New Year's Eve. You see, there's something about Christmas that gets the Misses extra hot for sex. And I don't mean the just slam it in, pull it out and roll over and go to sleep kind. She wants the works, which means.
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