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Istayed still as she released the flaps of tin foil from my hair. Atleast she had not inserted me in the oven after she had stuck thesepieces of cooking foil on me. "There we are." My mother cooed after shehad unfurled my hair and rinsed it with warm water. Alas I was mistakenabout being baked in an oven as she stuck me under a helmet and baked myhead. I think my hair was being pulled out by the roots after all. Theseinfernal plastic contraptions all tangled up in my hair were instrumentsof torture. I felt the need to confess to any indiscretion if only torelieve myself of the pain."Wakey, wakey!"Hmph... I was being pulled out of my chair as well as my pleasant slumberand brought abruptly back to painful reality by my over excited mother."Come along now, this is no time to sleep as there is so muchprettification to be done." Pretti ... what?" Mum was immune to my questions and protestations as shestridently led me to yet another chair."My goodness that will not do." My mother tut. But, because of my job I am very busy which helps keep my weight from ballooning. I married my high school sweetheart and yeah, I would agree that was probably the biggest mistake I ever made. If only I still didnt love the bitch. My wife Ann, formerly Ann Patricia Pryell, also of Suffolk County, Virginia, wasnt a cheerleader or homecoming queen. She was an athlete like me, short, compact and a fireball. Volleyball was her sport of choice. I mouthed off to her once during our Senior Year about how girlie volleyball was, so she asked me to field a few of her serves. After she damn near took my head off four times and I had had enough to profusely apologize to her. Physically, life hasnt been good to Ann, she bore me two children by caesarean and then cancer caused her to have a hysterectomy, so now her belly has two scars with the larger one going from one side of her hip, across her pelvis to the other side. The doctors told her that she would never again have a flat stomach because.
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