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It was a warm day in late September when northern California got it’s annual heatwave. Sarah used to call this time of year an “Indian Summer” but she knew that didn’t sound right in the politically correct Bay Area, so she tried not to use that phrase. But it was hot so she put on her bikini and was going to head out into the backyard to read a romance novel in the shade when she realized that the landscapers were there working. She looked down at her tiny swimsuit which didn’t leave much to the imagination and then out at the short, stocky latino men, brown skinned and sweating in the sun while they pulled weeds in her flower beds and mowed the lawn. It didn’t really seem proper to go parading half-naked in front of the workmen like this, thought Sarah as she hesitated. Samuel would definitely throw a fit if he caught her doing that. He could be so jealous sometimes. But then again, he wasn’t due home for hours yet, and Sarah rather liked the idea of giving these little Mexican. I saw the hearing aid.Her curiosity of who entered placated, her attention back to me, I spoke slowly in a soft but audible tone.“You’re hard of hearing, are you not?”She smiled, looked afar, waited for me to say more, confounded and finally replied.“It’s okay. What do you think?A few more verbal tests, as she fidgeted in ascending anxiety, her insecure replies and attempts to continue a conversation beyond heard grasp, confirmed she was bluffing. She was trying to be “normal” when not. She couldn’t hear me. It explained her proud, stuck up, school demeanor. She didn’t respond because she didn’t hear the hellos. Like at the café, she faked her way through school.How difficult a life, such a terrible card dealt, not being in the conversation, isolated, no one understanding your deaf plight, instead traduced to classmate scorn, our scathing, clever epithet quips trailing her passage through corridors and classrooms. It reminded me again what is, is not what is.How wrong to judge when.
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