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.”“I understand about money,” I said.“However,” he smiled, “we do have one we use for check rides for our pilots, and it happens to be available.”There we go.I’m familiar with the Bell 206s that are just about a standard ride for much work in the Gulf of Mexico. They’re being phased out by the more capable (and more expensive) Bell 407. I’m looking at a 407. We’re talking a bit over three million dollars, it weighs less full than our Pilatus (Yeah, okay ... I succumb to the inevitable – it’s OUR Pilatus) does empty. It’s less than half as fast and has twenty percent of the range, and it’s a helicopter.It’s a thousand parts wrapped in close formation around an oil leak, spinning on a pivot, waiting on metal fatigue.And I’m there with Cindy and Bjorn and he’s talking ‘er through the preflight.I belted myself into the cabin. Bjorn had the right seat, Cindy the left, making Bjorn the pilot. Helicopters are backwards in that regard.I listened on the headset as he talked her through. After all, when he woke up he would first have an immediate need to pee if he didn’t wet himself before then. In any case he would be extremely thirsty. The bottle jammed under the seat was sealed and unopened and he would certainly check it for any leaks but there would be none. I had used the needle through the roughening at the bottom and the miniature hole had then been sealed with glue. With the stuff I gave him it should look like he’d got sick from food poisoning or from bad water. Who was I trying to convince here? Most probably nobody would care, since he was known to be an arrogant and self-centered bastard even among his own. But a feared bastard. After what I had understood from his call, I had no problems with his death being painful.Most probably all those preparations were for nothing since nobody would come looking for him any time soon. But, just in case someone came and found him, I wanted to be sure that it would look like an accident. Or stupidity of a known.
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