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A box next to the dumpster I’d been dumped into in ninth grade was looking pretty tempting. Stan was around all the time. He and my mother weren’t living together, but it was a near thing. I think the only reason they weren’t is that I had no place to go. Stan was a retired army captain (I wasn’t shocked) and now was just living off his pension and disability. He’d injured his knee doing something heroic I’m sure. I hadn’t asked, though I’m pretty sure he told me at dinner the next night. He and my mother had met through some support group for windows and widowers. I had no idea my mom had been going to a support group. He really was nothing like my father – and I think that bothered me more than anything. My dad had been a tall, lanky man. He’d worn glasses for driving and television, but not to read. He’d been a life long democrat and hippy. He loved hiking and fishing and abhorred guns. He’d always kept his hair just a little bit long, but it always stuck straight out, giving. "I sure didn't have boobs like that when I was fifteen." Marge did," Don said. "I think she had the biggest tits in the entire school." I did not Don!" Marge snapped. "There were a lot of girls that had bigger boobs than I did." Maybe," Marc chuckled. "Not many though, and none with a body like yours." I showed Sally the pencil test the other day," Anne said. "She passed, I didn't."The group of parents laughed and made more comments about the size of the woman's breasts."I could never pass that stupid test," Marge said."What is the pencil test?" Liz asked innocently."It's where you put a pencil under your tit and see if it falls to the floor," Anne told her."Oh! I'll bet I could pass that test," Liz said.Jerry pulled his pen out of his pocket, held it up to his wife and said, "Here, prove it."In a move that shocked Jerry, as well as the rest of the group, Liz grabbed the pen from her husband's hand. She lifted her top, unfastened her bra and placed the pen beneath her breast. When.
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