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He became my motivation at work. He became the reason for my smile with his teasing skills and other things. His attention towards my body was good and makes me happy. Even my hubby was not aware of how many undergarments I have.I started talking my personal stuff with him, but still, I maintain my distance. One day I was in a horny mood and had sex with my hubby. I was not fully happy with hubby’s sex. But hubby was tired and fall asleep quickly. My kiddo was also sleeping, but I was not getting sleep.So I moved out of the bedroom and was watching a movie on mobile in another room. All of a sudden, I got what app message from him saying ‘Happy weekend.’Me: Happy weekend! Don’t drink and drive.He: Still awake?Me: Yes.He: It’s close to 12, and you were awake. I can understand your sex life.Me: I had sex with my hubby and not getting sleep.He: Liar, you are not satisfied with him.Me: Haha, yes. I was incomplete in sex.He: Please try me.Me: Shut up!He: give me a chance! I will try my. I get excited when it feels like it might get out of hand. After a trulyabusive session, when you'd think I would have felt the worst, I insteadfeel relieved, relaxed and empowered. .In my case the ultimate cause of this masochism was inadequate fathering.My dad was an iron worker and I remember him mostly being too tired to doanything with us boys (except, significantly, the occasional spanking). Somany of the skills I needed to function socially as a boy (i.e. learn tothrow a ball, learn to ride a bike) I had to do the best I could on my own.When a cousin or a pal would help me learn these things, I would end uphaving a crush on him (what I really needed was a dad). Since spankingswere one type of interaction my dad did do, I ended up making this powerdisplay a central theme in my adult fantasy life. I thought that somehow,if my dad really whipped me hard (which he never did) it would somehow"make a man out of me."In the early sixties it was still common for dads to whip their.
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