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I had already assured them that the smoke was not dangerous to them, it was just a sign of the god's favor to me. I probably laid it on a little too thick, but I gave a real performance lighting my cigarette and puffing as much smoke as I could manage. Anybody who happened to breathe in some of the smoke immediately started coughing. I made a point of how that proved that the gods had reserved the smoke for just me. This produced a lot of sage nodding of heads among the adults and looks of awe among the children.The children were sent to bed after the magic smoke demonstration, and the rest of the men sat with me, talking of hunting and how crowded the neighborhood was getting. There was actually another family group, about 13 people, only 2 miles away. However, they were less favored by the gods, since they didn't have such a powerful shaman.Before long, I asked where the latrine was, as I was feeling some bladder and intestinal pressure. They didn't know what I was talking about! I. They were getting ready to make their getaway when one of the tellers whispered, “Hey, buddy, would you do me a favor?”One of the robbers said, “What’s on your mind, pal?”“Would you mind taking the books, too? I’m five thousand short.”Offerings had been down the past several Sundays and the preacher decided he had to do something to change the trend. The next Sunday, as the plate was being passed he said... “Brothers and Sisters, I don’t like to have to do this, but there is a man in the congregation who is having an affair with another parishioner’s wife, and if there is not at least five dollars in the collection, I will reveal his name.”Later, as he counted the money he found 2O five dollar bills, and a two dollar bill with a note that read “Forever hold your peace, I’ll have that other three dollars before sundown.”I once found a throw rug in a catch basin.I bought a dog the other day ... I named him Stay. It’s fun to call him...”Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!” He went insane..
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