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I asked him why he did that and he explained to me that he thought about me every day . . . all the time . . . and that my panties smelled like me and made him horny, so he would jack-off in them.”‘Great,’ RJ thought, ‘now my cousins know that I am a total perv . . .this is just great!’Candy turned to look at RJ, who was looking very, very uncomfortable. “So RJ, you are awfully quiet, what happened next” Candy asked trying to engage her male cousin.“We just started fooling around. You know, Kayla wanted to know how boys jacked-off so I showed her. I wanted to know how girls did it, so she showed me. As some point we got to where we would have make-out sessions every day after school before mom got home from work. We would either masturbate in front of each other, or then we got to where I would get Kayla off and then she would do me.” While Candy had RJ talking, he still looked extremely uncomfortable.Candy looked at Kayla, “So who all knows about this, do all your friends know. And that’s not true -- it’s not -- I’ve never seen a UFO, and second cousins don’t count.A newlywed couple just moved into their new house. One day, the wife asked her husband, “Honey, one of the bathroom pipes is leaking. Could you fix it?”The husband looked at his wife and said, “What do I look like -- Mr. Plumber?”A few days went by, and his wife asked for a favor. “Honey, the car won’t start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?”“What do I look like -- Mr. Goodwrench?”A couple weeks later, the wife found a leak in the roof. “Honey, there’s a leak on the roof. Can you please fix it?”“What do I look like -- Bob Vila?” He sat down with a beer and watched a game on TV.One rainy weekend, the husband realized the leak on the roof was gone. He went to the bathroom and found that the pipe behind the sink wasn’t leaking anymore either.When his wife returned home, the husband asked, “Honey, how come there aren’t any more leaks and the car’s running?”She replied.
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