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She tilted her head up and read the ad. ‘Grow your penis 3 extra inches?’ ‘Jasmine!’ Dylan said, snatching the paper back and then pointed to the ad at the bottom. ‘No! This one!’ She looked again, reading it to herself and then out loud. ‘For sale. 1998 Mustang Cobra con-vert-a-ble, 10K O-B-O.’ She wrinkled her nose. ‘You going to drive somewhere?’ She asked, taking off her glasses. ‘Yes I am!’ Dylan said excitedly, pulling the phone off the charger. He dialed the number listed in the ad as Jasmine finished making his eggs. A moment later Dylan hung up. ‘Its mine!’ he said excitedly. ‘You such a boy,’ Jasmine said, herding him into the dining room. ‘Sit down and eat. I’ll find the suitcase.’ Smiling widely, Dylan sat and began to stuff his mouth with the warm eggs, his mind churning ideas and planning the route. In mid bite, he jumped from the table and went to the library, retrieving the road atlas his mother had gotten him for Christmas the year before. Returning, he sat again,. Q. Did you hear about the woodworker who fell into a vat of varnish?A. It was a terrible end, but a beautiful finish.I bought a dog from a blacksmith today. As soon as he got home he made a bolt for the door!A blond is walking down the street with one tit hanging out. A cop stops her and says, “Look darling, as pretty a picture as it makes, you’re going to have to put that away. I could cite you for indecent exposure.”“Why?” says the blond.“Your tit is hanging out!” replies the cop, astounded.The blond looks down and says “Oh, shit! I left the baby on the bus again!”A man’s been through a rough patch of health, and the docs can’t work out what’s wrong. After he’s baffled the final expert, his doctor turns to him and says, “We can’t work out why this is happening, but you’re probably going to die in the next three months. What you can do is cut out all fatty and spicy food. Get rid of alcohol, cigarettes, coffee, tea, and any other drugs. take walks every day, but make sure you don’t.
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