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He slowly placed a small black device on his patient’s forehead, and swiped a very long, bony finger across its interface. “Zis vill help break down the acetaldehyde which your body has been unable to clear from your system and remove many of the cogeners which seem to be present in your dark run ... ah no, RUM vis an ‘m’ ... than ze ozer, lighter vun.”Carl strained his eyes upward and could faintly see the deep green light the device was emitting but was rewarded for the effort with a lancing pain behind his eyes.“Couldn’t you have done this before I woke up Drillax so that I didn’t have to experience this whopper of a hangover?”“Stop being such a small post-gestational Dunkarian, Carl ... and just drink your ... what did you call it? A juice cube, juicy square, juicy box? While ve vere able to replace much of the blood you lost, you are still qvuite dehydrated.”“Yes mommy...” he replied loudly, turning his head and muttering “It’s a juice BOX and I am not being a baby.”“I have. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.THE CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq ... Why don’t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we’re not using it anymore.THE 10 COMMANDMENTS The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this -- you cannot post ‘Thou Shalt Not Steal’ ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery’ and ‘Thou Shall Not Lie’ in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians ... It creates a hostile work environment.Also, think about this ... If you don’t want to forward this for fear of offending someone -- Stand up and dare to be politically incorrect.You Can Thank Smokeyjoe for This One:Paddy was walking along the road, when he noticed a small man crossing. A car was coming, so Paddy rushed up, grabbing the little fella and threw themselves to the side of the road, just avoiding being hit.“Ah! Thank you Paddy me lad. You just saved me.
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