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Or, who knows? Maybe that Judy chick will give me head when we go to lunch tomorrow…He puts on his briefs and a t-shirt, picks up a pillow and a sheet to cover himself with and tiptoes out of his bedroom, and then downstairs to the living room. Crashing on the sofa, where he can be caught by his parents, will provide a good deterrent to masturbation, he reasons. He lies down on the sofa, covering himself with his sheet and turns on the TV. Putting it on mute, he finds the most boring programming imaginable; a late night cooking show. Ugh! How can mom watch this shit? he wonders to himself, reflecting that it’s the best way to kill his boner. In the quiet stillness of the house, the sound of his dad’s snoring wafts downstairs from the master bedroom. Keeping his hands carefully on top of the sheet, with his dad’s distant snoring buzzing in his ears and the silent, insipid ministrations of the Hit-and-Run Chef numbing his brain, the teen quickly drifts off into a leaden sleep… J.J. is. I was just getting to where I could accept that. Now we’re talking about recommitting to it in a big way. It’s big, too. Like giving someone you love a second chance after they purposefully threw you away. Painful, scary stuff. Am I going to do it? Oh, fuck yes. But I keep seeing that number seventeen at Triple A, and I can’t help but think that I’ve got a little bargaining power here. If I’m going to do this, what do I want to ask for? ‘Paul,’ I say, ‘do me a favor. Don’t tell your manager about this conversation until tomorrow. But when you do, tell him that he can call me and I will absolutely be picking up the phone. Okay?’ He wrinkles his brow. ‘So…you’re doing it?’ ‘Just have him call me. Okay?’ ‘Uh, yeah. If that’s what you want.’ ‘Thanks. You want to share a little celebratory wine before you go?’ I ask. He does. So we do. — The moon has a lot more patience than I do. Swollen and yellow, it takes a lazy, arcing route over the city of Nashville. It doesn’t much enjoy my.
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