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All thechildren started crying and shouting at once, each blaming each otherfor the atrocities that had occurred.After a few judicial slaps followed by the blatant bribery of chocolatethey eventually agreed to be good.A strange peace fell on our household, the only noise being little Bobbythrowing up in the aspidistra plant pot and Timmy eating the contents ofhis nose.At long last it was cartoon time on the TV and the kids were super-gluedto the screen. Thank God for cable. The In-laws couldn't think of anymore insulting things to say about us and me in particular and bid us anot-so-fond adieu.Nine-thirty and I was, hopefully, in the home straight.Supper was now served and more food was thrown down the overworkedgullets of the remaining revellers. Cold turkey sandwiches, sausagerolls, scotch eggs and indescribable things on little wooden sticks wereonce again served up and eaten with apparent relish. Jelly, blancmangeand lumps of cake were strewn around the floor by kids and adults. " Nodding, I said, "I do know that." Amy added, "And it is an important part of your development. If you really are going to be adventurous you have to be willing to try new things." "Are you going to handcuff me to the bed?" Mel stood up and walked over to the toy box. She returned holding a dog collar and a leash. "No honey we have something that will be much more appropriate for you. You need to be trained." I gasped. Amy giggled. "Don't worry Michael, it's going to be fun." Laughing, I said, "The two of you have a very creative interpretation of the word fun." "Yes we do, but have we ever steered you wrong?" Mel was grinning at me. "No, you haven't. I can always call time out, right?" Nodding, Mel said, "Yes, if you do that we'll stop immediately. Taking a deep breath, I said, "Okay, let's do it. You're right. If I really am going to become more adventurous I have to be willing to try new things." Mel placed the collar around my neck, fastened it and attached the leash. While Mel.
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