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After a while, he brought out a bottle of wine and we talked and just hung out. Then he asks if I’d like to make dinner with him! God! A naked man who cooks! No wonder his girlfriend is so possessive.It was getting cold anyway so we went inside and made some pasta and a salad and started another bottle of wine. We never put our clothes back on. I think if either of us had suggested it, the other would have gotten self conscious and we really didn’t want to spoil the mood. We ate dinner naked at this tiny table in his kitchen and it was awesome. He got right into the nudist thing, and said he might even consider going to the beach with me. So I’ve made a convert!At that point, things got a little out of control. After the dinner and two bottles of wine, we started doing dishes together (I insisted on helping and he insisted on helping me help. ???) and one of us, I won’t say who, got soap suds splashed on her tits. So Mister Splashy gets dish water splashed on his chest, and a. "Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes; come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller!Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet!I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off!Old age is coming at a really bad time!Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!I don't have white hair, I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just very wise.My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would've put them on my knees.The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes".I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people"?Even duct tape can't.
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